One "Hail Mary" uttered sincerely
is more potent
and better
than a thousand uttered mechanically,
for the heart is not made pure by prayer
but rather
prayer is made pure
by the pure heart. - Meister Eckhart
When the healer needs healing, what can she do?
I've been in need of healing many times in my life. I got into healing to heal my own heart after a great loss. I never could have imaged where that would have led me, but lead me it did, right into my lifes work. I've had many trials, losses, traumas and grievenes since then, like we all have. I remember when I was young I felt that if I was good enough God might spare me of such loss. But thats just not how this world works, or how God works. God works in mysterious ways after all.
So instead of worrying if I was good, I focused on being of service. Life happens regardless so I might as well choose what I came here to do in this life - the purposeful work that changes ones soul to pure gold. Instead of searching for gold externally - you discover it was inside all along.
If life is not without suffering, how can we transform that suffering to give us more life?
One of the hardest obstacles i've faced in this 'role' is -
What if I need healing?
Now I see it as, of course I'll need healing. Thats just part of life.
As life happens we all need a sacred space to process and transform what we are in.
In the past I have dealt with health conditions that have completely stopped my life, that froze me with fear, that hindered me in many ways both physcially and mentally. At my lowest point a few years back, I sat with God on my tree and said, I dont know why this is happening and I dont need to know, but please just give me strength of spirit.
And even in the worst of times physically- I can feel my spirit in bloom. Some days I really have to search for that feeling, but its there.
At one time, I was ashamed to be going through such "sickness." I've helped others, why cant I help myself? My mind would continuiously ask, when will this be over?
Every day in meditation, i'd sit with God, my angels, my guides, my father, my loved ones in spirit and ask these questions. But soon I started to receive guidance, visuals, words of wisdom and slowly but surly I started to heal. I asked God to take the lead, I surrendered, I knew I didnt have the answers and finally, I could settle in and heal. I allowed myself to be angry and sad and feel it all.
I started to trust again, God and Myself. I knew my body was working for me and not against me.
Even now, the dis-ease has not completely left and still rears its ugly head when it chooses. It can completely send me into a terrified state, but not for long, and certainly not like it used to. Progress has been made. And when I am in one of these 'flares' I seek healing, not just from my own spirit team but from other healers as well.
Recently I received energy healing and on the left side of my body I saw as clear as day a white swan raising its wings up as though it were about to fly. Ive never seen this image for myself and knew it was significant and a symbol for me in this moment. I thanked the swan for appearing and went home and looked up the meaning.
The Swan:
The swan becomes a bearer of spiritual medicine, guiding us on a transformative journey of seeking inner peace, embracing personal growth and navigating lifes transitions with grace while remaining firmly connected to ones true esesence. At the heart of the swan's symbolism lies the essence of transformation. A metamorphosis that symbolizes the beauty of growth and change. Embrace transformation, release what no longer serves us and emerge as our true authentic selves. By embodying the swan's transformative spirit we can let go of limiting beliefs embrace our inner potential and step into the fullness of our being.
What the swan really brought me was a change in perspective. How else can I see this? not as a victim but as a warrior of my own destiny. The swan came at the perfect time and as a great gift. To remind me of my own authentic nature and how transformation IS happening, I just needed a reminder. When your lost in the mud, take a look around and see whats showing up as a much needed gift.
Healing is all things.
When we can release the need to know and accept the wonder that all possibilities exist for us, we can find ourselves healing, even through the mud.
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